sunday march 09, 2008 (georgetown, bahamas)

 

“Do you have any balloons?”

“No”

“Do you know what the second brightest star in the night sky is?”

“No”

“Have you got a black tie?”

“Of course not”

“How about a pair of white boots?”

Uh... nope.

If you planned your schedule carefully here in Georgetown you could attend Beach Church, play a sporting round of bingo, try your luck at a geriatric Bridge tournament, and even have a conversation with total strangers like the one we quoted above. All in one day. We exchanged those words with a nice older couple in a dinghy after they knocked on the side of our boat and told us that they were participating in a scavenger hunt. A scavenger hunt?  It’s not exactly rum, sodomy and the lash on the high seas any more folks, but I guess it works for some. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not pining for the lash (or sodomy for that matter) but it’s safe to say that our daydreams a year ago weren’t filled with thoughts of bead polishing seminars on an exotic beach. Nor did we lay awake at night dreaming about the day that we would be able to risk life and limb in order to see a group of 60 year olds dress their dogs up for a parade in an exotic port of call. So what are we doing here?

The height of our efforts to date has brought us here, to Georgetown. It’s known to some as “Chicken Harbor”. There are several hundred boats here. Most seem to be from somewhere on the U.S. East coast or Quebec and apparently most don’t go any further. Thus the poultry inspired nick-name. There are organized events here daily. Every morning the pre-arranged “activities” are announced on a very structured VHF radio show. To our surprise they even transmit portions of the broadcast in French due to the high number of Québécois here. Speaking of which, people here think all Canadians here actually have an affinity for wearing red speedos because of them. We being from a non speedo wearing western province are shocked and appalled and would encourage, no, fervently petition any of our French speaking countrymen to PLEASE leave the speedos at home! Hey Quebecors we love you but please trade in the banana hammocks in for a respectable pair of board shorts. You’re giving us a bad name.

Back to the last few weeks’ adventure. Way back in Warderick Wells we assailed our long list of boat chores with gusto. After tearing apart the leaky toilet I discovered that the base needed replacing, and that Charles was a true friend. Who else but a true friend would offer to help with a job like that and then show up with tools in hand? With a band-aid solution in place we decided to move on to more exciting pursuits. That was pretty much it for our list of chores. Maybe “assailed” was the wrong word then, I guess we sort of nipped at our long list of chores.

cuddling.JPG
giantplumber.JPG
gross.JPG

Ghoulish tales of ancient ship wrecks and headless corpses abounded here. There’s a spot on the island named “Boo Boo Hill” where in addition to a great view, you were supposed to be able to hear shipwrecked lost souls wailing away about some injustice. We didn’t hear any lost souls but there was a cairn (I think that’s the word) at the top where it has become tradition to leave some kind of memorabilia with your boat name on it. There’s a great stack of markers made from wood, rope and stone that have been left by visiting boaters. We found several from folks we had met along the way. Kinda neat. Back at Wild Ride we set to work with Charles and Giselle to create a commemorative plaque worthy of our cat clan. After chisels, sander, router, paint and an immense group effort had been applied to a lucky scrap of wood that we had rescued from a fire pit, our masterpiece was ready. The Wild Ride, Some Days a Diamond (www.somedaysadiamond.com), and Slapdash crews made the long and arduous hike (okay, more short and easy than long and arduous) up to Boo Boo Hill. We planted the sign with much champagne and the flashing of flash bulbs. Hopefully it survives the hurricane season.

theartists.JPG
thehike.JPG
theclan.JPG
madeourmark.JPG

We left Warderick Wells on February 18th and made our way to Compass Cay. On the way we spent a couple of hours snorkeling around an area labeled on our charts as The Aquarium (for good reason), and visited another plane wreck nearby, which no self respecting Bahamian Cay would be without. There really must have been a lot of bad pilots, or crappy planes around here back in the day. After a night at Compass Cay we made our way to Staniel Cay and were pretty excited to meet up with Dave and Jan from Zing. They welcomed us with champagne and we snorkeled at the famous Thunderball grotto (see: James Bond). That night new friends were acquainted with old and to make everyone feel at ease I decided to throw myself off the back of the boat. Dave and Jan had everyone over (8 of us in total) and after several rounds of southern hospitality a few of the guys visited the back deck to “check the props” (take a leak). Long story short; in very dramatic fashion I ended up in the drink before my fly was down. The catamarans I had been frequenting have steps cut into the aft hulls.  Zing (a Saint Francis 43) did not. I also maintain that I had been savagely pushed but the story has never gained popular support. I was able to retain a small piece of dignity by going on the same night to play a perfect round of “OH Hell!” after my refreshing dip.

 
wetseth.jpg
 

The next day Charles and Giselle came by and picked us up for a visit to Big Majors, a nearby Cay inhabited by a bunch of tropical pigs. The sight of a pig swimming (yes, swimming) up to our dinghy while still 30 yards from the beach looking for a handout is not a sight we will soon forget. Ahh yes, a white sand beach, clear blue tropical waters and… swimming pigs? Quite the juxtaposition. Oh, and just for the record, pigs are excellent swimmers. We shot some video, one day I will get a page set up on the site with some of our video clips. They are just the crappy shorts taken with my digital camera, but give you the general idea.

swimmingbacon.JPG
kickinback.JPG
pigposse.JPG

Over the next few days we worked our way down the Exumas stopping at Gaudin, Black Point, Mooshu and Rat Cay. With Zing we were now part of a 4 catamaran armada. The routine was almost unbearable. First of all, every stop was more incredibly breathtakingly stupidly picturesque than the last.  Abundant lobster and spear fish earned us a nightly potluck on one of the boats to consume the days take with good friends. We were able to sample Grouper, Yellow Tail Snapper, Wahoo, Mahi-Mahi and of course lots of lobster. It was almost more than we could take. How awful.

gaudin.JPG
mooshulobster.JPG
wildriders.JPG

On February 25th we arrived in Georgetown. We were expecting our friends, Pat and Jessica from Vancouver, to meet us here and they did. The night before they had arrived we set our anchor and watched a massive lightening and thunder storm just miss us. A big front was moving through and since Pat and Jes were coming on a boat from Nassau we were worried all night about them. Apparently we had both missed the worst of it though and their long 12 hour boat ride from Nassau was uneventful save the air condinitioning being cranked the whole way. I guess the crew wrapped up in sleeping bags and left the passengers to half freeze. They were a little bleary eyes but there to meet us on the dock at 6:30AM on Thursday Feb 28th.

 
fastferry.JPG
 

A little background on Pat & Jes.  Jaime and Jessica had worked together in Vancouver and had become fast friends. Pat is one of the smartest guys I know and has decided to hang himself from skyscrapers to make a living. We were pretty excited to see them both. The first couple of days were difficult though. Pat and Jessica were introduced into our new life in an uncomfortable anchorage with 25-40 knot winds. Fortunately things were looking up. After a couple of days mostly spent indoors and scurrying around to different anchorages to find shelter, we were all enjoying the type of weather you would expect to find in the Bahamas.

brrr.JPG
captainpat.JPG
patandhisray.JPG

Pat and Jes were here for a week. We introduced them to some of the crazy friends we had made along the way. Since they are crazy too they all got along famously.  One particular night we were at a local establishment and were shocked to see yet another crazy crew from Slapdash past. Jaime had spotted De Dutch that we had sadly left behind in Key Largo and had been looking for ever since. It was an unbelievable reunion. They generously invited us all back to their boat for drinks. We told them that there were 8 of us and they didn’t even flinch. Soon afterwards all 10 of us were on the JoHo getting better acquainted. It was an extraordinary evening. Here was this big group of people who were all far away from home together on a boat in the middle of a harbor getting to know each other. Every person there was really special to us in some way, and here we were all in the same place at the same time. Incredible.

ourpeeps.JPG
depannekooks.JPG
morecrazies.JPG

Over the next couple of days we explored the islands with Pat and Jes and wondered why with all these hundreds of boats here that we could still find secluded anchorages and great restaurants that only the locals seemed to patronize. Everyone seems to cram themselves into 3 or 4 anchorages, and don’t wander too far for their food and drink either. I don’t want to be too hard on these folks though, the majority seem to be genuinely good people. It just seems a little strange to us that so many fall into this super structured floating suburb of a routine… for months!

Within the same week we found ourselves saying goodbye to dear friends. It’s always amazing to us how fast you get to know people when you travel with them like this. A couple of weeks seems to equal a year or two at home. That made it especially difficult to part ways with Dave and Jan from Zing, Tom and Carol from Some Day’s A Diamond, Charles and Giselle from Wild Ride, and John and Jolanda from JoHo. We are all going our separate ways, but are certain that we’ll see each other again somewhere down the road. Actually we may see Wild Ride sooner than later. We learned a day before they were to leave that they may be planning to cross the Pacific at the same time we are. They’re taking a different route but we hope to see them in Panama sometime in the coming weeks.

Speaking of Panama, we’ve got some decisions to make. Our unavoidable delay leaving Florida has left us with fewer options. We still plan to cross the Pacific this year, but getting to Panama in time will require some creative route planning. Our original plan may not be feasible anymore. We are going to talk this over during the next day or two and make a fast decision. Stay tuned.

 

tuesday march 11, 2008 (georgetown, bahamas)

 

We’ve spent the last couple of days finishing off the list of chores that we started nipping at back in Warderick Wells. The next leg of our trip will be through the Ragged Islands (or Jumentos). They are very remote and almost totally uninhabited. The only population is on one small island near the end of the chain which consists of 90 people living in Duncantown. So we needed to make sure that anything we might need is already on the boat. This meant a lot of trips ferrying fuel, water, groceries, laundry etc back and forth in the dink.

We will get underway today sometime. After we leave Georgetown we probably won’t have internet access until we arrive in Cuba. From Cuba we’ll need to make a straight shot to Panama in order to make it in time for a Pacific crossing. All that’s left for us to decide is whether to turn right or left once we get to Cuba. That’s the plan d’jour anyway. We had seriously considered spending an extra year visiting all the central American countries before we crossed but traded that for more time in the South Pacific. We made the decision thinking that it would be easy for us to get back to Central and South America some day, but the little islands in the South Pacific could be a once in a lifetime thing.

So, one more visit to town to drop off the garbage, update the website and send off some emails and then we’re on the move and on our own again.

wednesday march 12, 2008 (hog cay, bahamas)

With the website updated and the boat all shippity shape we yanked our chain and slipped out of Georgetown at 2:00PM yesterday. We wanted to position ourselves for the trip to Water Cay by shaving off as many miles as possible before dark. The best case scenario was to get through Hog Cut at slack tide and anchor on the other side. Then there would be nothing but 25 miles or so of water between us and our first stop in the Jumentos. Passing through Hig Cut is an option for us due to the shallow draft of our boat, but we would still need to pass at high tide since there were a few spots showing only “0.9” (meters) on the charts with a hard bottom. No problem since it was beginning to look like our impeccable planning would see us through the cut at high slack tide. Slack tide is the time between water rising and lowering, and since there can be a strong current through this narrow passage timing was everything. Jaime confirmed this since she has taken on the role of weather and tide reports, she is the slapdash meteorological department. For those who have sent us emails wondering if Jaime ever screws up, or if I’m the only one falling off boats and getting creative with diesel and water cocktails, please pay close attention to the next paragraph.

We approached the cut and everything seemed fine. There was virtually no current, we were lined up perfectly and even though there was only a few minutes to spare before sunset it looked as though we would be on the other side of this cut in no time. We started cautiously feeling our way into the channel when I noticed that the rocks were showing a lot of algae which would be pretty unusual at high tide. At this point Jaime was sick of me asking her to confirm the timing of our passage so I checked myself. The timing was spot on, but she had the tides reversed. Oops! Now we were completely committed and passing with the lowest possible water. We discussed our options and decided to raise the drive leg, retract our rudders and sail through. This would reduce our draft to a mere 18 inches, and even with the rudders retracted we’re able to maintain a small degree of steerage. So we bumped and scraped our way through a passage under sail at low tide that many boats opt to avoid even at high tide. There were some tense moments but we eventually cleared the narrow winding channel and felt pretty good about ourselves. We even anchored in time to enjoy the sunset, each with a margarita in hand.

This morning we raised the main and sailed out of the anchorage but this was short lived. It wasn’t long before the wind was on our nose again. We motor sailed into 16-20 knot winds and toughed out a choppy and uncomfortable ride to Water Cay. When we arrived and dropped anchor we were facing wind of 10 knots and a current of 1.5 knots. But the funny thing was that the boat just drifted right into the wind and current. It was very odd. Even when the tide eventually shifted we stayed in the same spot. Our only reasonable explanation is that there must have been some kind of opposing current in the little pocket that we were in. With 100 feet of chain out we just floated right over top of our anchor the whole time that we were there. We didn’t even need to drop an anchor, we could have just killed the engine and floated there for as long as we liked.

We’ve been warned innumerable times to stay out of the water at Water Cay because of the sharks. Although its uninhabited this is apparently a common spot for fisherman to stop and clean their catches before heading home. We’ve heard this a million times though so don’t usually put too much stock into shark tales. After we were settled into our anchorage I geared down and got ready to splash of the back deck for a traditional evening swim. Jaime was sitting on the back deck so I jokingly asked her to keep an eye out for sharks while I dove in. A few seconds later I surfaced to the sound of Jaime’s startled voice telling me to “get in the boat now!” After practically leaping straight out of the water I was back on deck about a tenth of a second later. There was no shark but it was easy to see why she thought it was. The biggest Barracuda we’ve seen yet shot straight out from underneath the boat as soon as I hit the water. He was well over a meter long and as thick as a scuba tank at the middle, obviously well fed. I don’t know what it is with the Barracuda here, we’ve seen them on plenty of dives all over the place but never this many, never this big and never this aggressive. I finished my bath with a bucket that night watching the Barracuda while he floated almost motionless just off the back of the boat, like he was taunting us.

Later on we took the dinghy to shore and explored for a while. There was a beautiful little cove with a nice beach, and we had the whole place to ourselves. This was more like it.

privatebeach.JPG
castaways.JPG
onlyours.JPG

thursday march 13, 2008 (nurse cay, bahamas)

We were on our way to Nurse Cay today and decided to do a little fishing along the way. This morning the same big Barracuda was still hanging around the boat, and we half expected him to follow us out of the bay. He was persistent and big, but still no shark. In fact, other than a few Nurse sharks we haven’t seen any at all. That all changed today.

I had two lines out, one hand line and one rod and reel combination. I’ve never used bait and just troll along with various lures. It wasn’t long before we had fish on both lines. In as much time as it took me to get to the rod and set the hook, maybe 15 seconds, I was watching 4 sharks absolutely demolish the fish on the hand line. This lasted at least a minute, and was only 20 yards off the back of the boat. Water was churning and foaming around a writhing ball of fins and teeth. It was terrifying. We have never seen anything like this so were pretty engrossed in the show. I almost forgot about the second fish until the rod suddenly doubled over and was nearly ripped out of my hands. The feeding frenzy had now moved onto our second fish. Jaime took this opportunity to pull in the hand line and there wasn’t a scrap of fish left on it. We expected the same for the second but in his enthusiasm one of the sharks had taken the hook as well. I watched helplessly as 400 yards of line spun off the reel. Luckily with only a few wraps left on the reel he stopped his run and I began to bring him in. Jaime was at the helm maneuvering the boat and I was playing a seemingly endless game of taking in a bunch of line and then watching it all spin back out. This went on for the better part of an hour. Eventually we had the culprit beside the boat. Now what? It may not have been the best decision, but I was determined to get my hook back. We had already lost our dinner to these guys so weren’t about to lose our tackle as well. It was easy to get caught up in the moment, but my resolve weakened a little once he was snapping and thrashing against the side of the boat. Nevertheless with a combination of patience, gaff, and vice grips I managed to return with line, lure and fingers still in tact.

After the shark episode we also landed a small Barracuda and a Bonito. Then something really big hit the rod and went on a lightening fast run. I have no idea what it was but it took over 400 yards of line off the rod without stopping in about one minute. That put an end to an exciting day of fishing.

catchoftheday.JPG
sharkbait.JPG
slapdashvsshark.JPG

We approached Nurse Cay in water so clear that we could see the shadow of our boat 40 feet below us on the ocean floor. We were going through an uncharted area so Jaime was watching for coral heads and rocks but with water this clear we were never in any danger. We enjoyed another quiet evening in a completely secluded and picture perfect bay. The beauty of our surroundings is beyond my capabilities to describe, but I’m sure you have no trouble imagining the blue water, the white sand, the crashing surf and the incredible sunset. But to take in the beauty of those surroundings while being serenaded by farm animals is something that you would truly have to experience to appreciate. Why this island would be inhabited only by a crowing rooster and a bleating goat is completely beyond me.

friday march 14, 2008 (duncantown, bahamas)

The Ragged Islands are tiny specks in our chart book, and at the end of those specks on a tiny speck is a tiny speck. With me so far? The tiny speck on the tiny speck at the end of the tiny specks is a place called Duncantown, population 75. And what this town lacks in size it makes up for in character. It’s far removed and is in fact closer to Cuba than any other settlement in the Bahamas. We’ve been looking forward to visiting this elusive little speck since we heard about it, which was before we left Vancouver. It didn’t let us down.

We arrived just before dinner and were so excited to see town that we had barely set the anchor before launching the dinghy. We had a 2 mile channel that leads into town through the mangroves to transit before dark.  In our haste though, we ended up forgetting our little map of the channel and started getting hopelessly lost. Luckily we saw a local running back and forth from the mail boat and decided to follow him.  A bit of a geography lesson on Duncantown; the water that surrounds the island is too shallow for the mail boat to come right in so they have to run their skiffs back and forth all day long, up and down this long channel, full to the brim with the town’s supplies, mail, etc. Since these guys do this all the time we thought we’d be in good hands. Since the tide was almost out though (our new specialty) we almost ended up having to get out of the dinghy and walk through the murky swamp. Turns out we were following a particular local that didn’t mind churning up the bottom with his boat as we followed cautiously, picking our way through the shallows. We arrived dry and resolved to find the proper channel for our return trip.

enroute.JPG
entrancemarker.JPG
dinghyharbor.JPG

We were greeted upon arrival by a group of happy locals. Not so sure why they were so happy because they were unloading a pallet of plywood. But they were glad to see us and tell us where to find the nearest bar (de green one up de hill mon). So up de hill we went where we wandered through Maxine’s grocery, meeting Maxine of course who gave us a short discourse on the ins and outs of Duncantown. Then off past the house with the goat on the fence, and beside the house with the peacocks on the roof we found de green one. The bar looked more like it had been closed for 5 years but we wandered in anyway and met Raphael. Since we’ve been in the Bahamas for over a month we figured that we would have the vernacular pegged. Not so. But after a few Kaliks we were getting on track.

The house beside de green one (with the peacocks on the roof) was Raphael’s, the bar owner. We asked about food because in our hurry we had left the boat before eating anything and it was now about 7PM. He started making a few phone calls (one of those old rotary phones) but couldn’t track down any food for us. Not to be so easily defeated he went next door to his house. After a few minutes he came back with his wife Marjorie who asked us if fish and rice would be okay, since she was making some anyway a couple more plates would be no problem. Our protests went unheard and a little while later she returned with a whole grilled snapper and fried rice for each of us. We devoured the generous portions and I pretended to suck out the fish eyes, something our hosts insisted upon. It’s a bit of a delicacy I guess, either that or they were just entertaining themselves at our gastronomical expense. Maybe it was the exotic surroundings, the company or maybe it was the Kaliks, but fish eyes aside we both agreed that it was the best fish we’ve had. Throughout the evening locals were circulating through the bar and every one of them stopped to chat with us about life, fish stories, boats,  and my new favorite subject; sharks. We met a group of fisherman that were anchored out in the bay and they generously offered to guide us back to our boat through the now darkened maze of mangroves. They idled their skiff navigating by moonlight and taking care not to get too far from us. Easier said than done, our dinghy has only one speed (slow).  By some incredible feat of navigation they found the random marker (aka: a tiny nondescript piece of metal sticking out of the water) in the middle of nowhere and turned us safely towards our boat. We traded a good dead for a good dead by teaching them how to find the North Star, something that Tom from Some Days A Diamond taught us about 3 weeks ago.

mainroad.JPG

peacocks.JPG

auntysheila.JPG

saturday march 15, 2008 (ragged island, bahamas)

We spent our time today getting positioned and ready to go for our overnight Cuba crossing. We think it will take about 15 hours. We finally got to meet up with Meander after all this time passing each other in Georgetown and through the Raggeds.  We’re feeling lucky that we met them at the end of the line so we would have some company for the crossing.

While Seth did all things enginey I set to work on ‘sewing’ a Cuba flag. If you know me at all you know that I do not sew or do most anything domestic. But I had learned a trick from Yolanda on Joho on using fabric paint on old bed sheets. No sewing = no bleeding = no swearing.

Besides catching up with Meander, we found out where all of the elusive West Coasters are hiding. We were visited by 2 boats from Seattle. They are a rare commodity out here and I think they were equally shocked to see our home port when we rolled in. Kittiwake and Slow M’Ocean spent some time chatting with us under a scorching hot sun.

sunday march 16, 2008 (ragged island, bahamas)

By 5:30PM we were using the last of our daylight to navigate our way safely off the Bahamian bank and into the deep water separating us from Cuba. Conditions were perfect and before long we were sailing under the Genoa with 15 knots of wind pushing us towards our destination.

Just before sunset we turned around and caught this, which would be our last glimpse of the Bahamas. We watched the little Cays slowly sink into our wake, and then it was dark.

lastlook.JPG

noswearing.JPG

noblood.JPG

Jaime too the first shift and I took over at 10PM. We would do 4 hour each until we arrived. This would leave us both with some time to try and get some sleep. There was a lot of big ship traffic so we needed a watch on at all times. During our shifts we would chat with Meander, avoid ocean going container ships, and pick away at the brown bag lunches that Jaime built. When things get rough it can be a very unpleasant job to prepare food, so it was nice to have some sandwiches made up in advance for a quick eat.

The moon and stars were incredible which made it easy to see the flying fish skimming along the surface beside the boat. I started my second shift at 6AM and we reduced sail so that we wouldn’t arrive in Cuba before sunrise. When the sun came up we were about seven miles off shore and I had my first glimpse of Cuba. It was quite a sight to see the green mountains raise up from the horizon. I sipped on my coffee and watched Cuba get bigger and bigger…

firstlook.JPG

goodmorning.JPG

cuba.JPG

monday march 17, 2008 (bahia de vita, cuba)

We arrived at Bahia De Vita just before 9AM. Our calls to the Guarda Frontera (Coast Guard) went unanswered so we just made our way into the marina pretty soon they hailed us and I finally got to put my scripted response to good use. “Estamos el yate de vela Slapdash de Canada” or something like that. I have no idea what their reply was, so I just said “si, gracias” and headed for the marina. The marina is in this incredible little pocket bay with protection from all sides. It’s the best natural harbor that we’ve seen, but once we saw the docks we realized that we were going to be tested again. I think I’ve said this before but its tough to arrive after a passage and still have the hardest job ahead of you. We would need to bring slapdash in backwards perpendicular to a concrete dock. There’s a mooring ball about 80 feet from the dock, we needed to fix a bow line there and then back into our spot trying not to hit the boats that were on both sides of us or the concrete dock behind us. I was at the helm and Jaime was at the bow keeping tension on the line to keep the bow from swinging around while I backed in. Everything was going well until Jaime looked back and said “that’s it”. Like I said, the mooring ball was 80 feet from the dock, but our line was only 30 feet so there was still 50 feet of water between us and the safety of setting a couple secure stern lines. It was a precarious position, and we noticed that our neighbors were casually gathering their fenders up just in case. Jaime tied in a second line while I used the engine to keep us centered and pretty soon we were making progress… for another 30 feet. Now we were only 20 feet from the dock. I threw a stern line to the dock and then went forward to help Jaime attach our third line. To our relief (and our neighbors) we were finally able to reach the dock and secure the back end of our boat. Other than taking a little longer than it should have I would say that we pretty much nailed it. We felt better after watching several other boats do exactly the same thing. I guess they set the mooring balls so far out so that they can accommodate any length of vessel, but it would have been nice to know in advance. Come to think of it, maybe that’s what the Guarda Frontera was trying to tell us?

We’ve heard all about the complicated Cuban check-in process so already knew that it would be a long day. They lived up to their reputation, we lost count of the amount of officials we had on and off the boat that day. First the doctor, then customs, immigration, harbor master (2), some guy who sprayed insecticide in our bathroom, and a dog to sniff around the boat. They all asked pretty much the same questions and each had multiple forms to be filled out. It might sound like a nightmare, but we actually had a lot of fun with it. We weren’t allowed to take any pictures, which is too bad because at one point I think we had six people on the boat. Every one of them was great. Very friendly, very polite, applauded our attempts at completely butchering their language, and even took their shoes off on the dock and hopped aboard in their socks. Once we had satisfied all of the criteria (we didn’t have the plague, weren’t smuggling drugs or humans, weren’t infested with bugs etc etc) we were invited to take down the quarantine flag and officially welcomed into Cuba with flowers and a complimentary cocktail. The total cost of clearing in was about 100 dollars to be paid out in varying amounts to 6 different officials, and not one of them asked for immediate payment. They said that they would be around so we should just come and find them once we were all settled and comfortable, at our convenience. They still had a job to do, but sincerely tried to accommodate us in any way that they could. You usually think of clearing in as a big hassle and usually it is, and here they had more documents to complete than most countries, but when we think about the experience we mostly remember friendly people and laughing all afternoon. 

wednesday march 19, 2008 (bahia de vita, cuba)

Back in December I snapped a tooth on a corn nut or something and made some comment about getting a filling in Cuba. Today I made good on that statement, and learned that I should be more careful about running my mouth off like that.

By 10:00AM I was on my way from the marina to the clinic in an ambulance. It was actually looked a lot like a station wagon, but they called it an ambulance for some reason. Since I had been assured that this ambulance would be cheaper than taking a cab I didn’t mind. We arrived at a small but tidy clinic after a 20 minute drive. The driver told me that he would wait around to take me back to the marina once the dentist was through with me. The dentist introduced himself, asked me to take a seat, and fired up his drill after nothing more than a perfunctory glance at my broken tooth. I was a little taken back by the efficiency of it all, this being my first bit of dentistry in a foreign country. At home there’s the waiting room, the magazines, and the soft music. After you are finally seated you visit with at least a couple of pleasant assistants before the doctor swoops in and makes his grand appearance. The time span between showing up for your appointment and hearing a drill fire up that’s actually meant to be used on your face can easily be an hour. But let’s not forget the anesthetic. You know, the liquid content of the two or three needles injected sometime between getting comfy in that big chair and before any real work begins? The stuff that’s meant to save you the unpleasant bit of gut wrenching agony generally associated with having your teeth drilled and leaves you a drooling mess for a couple of hours afterwards?  Yeah, well they don’t have that here. The speed with which you are seated and work commences is to minimize the time available for you to consider the implications of a stone cold sober dental treatment. Because if you did have the time to consider the implications of a stone cold sober dental treatment, you would likely be running for the door before the dentist could say “just a little wider please”. None of this trickery was necessary for me. It’s not that I have a great tolerance for pain or because I’m a masochist or anything. It wasn’t necessary because as I’ve already mentioned this was my first non-Canadian dental experience and in my wildest dreams I wouldn’t have guessed that the drilling and filling I was about to enjoy would be without any freezing.

I think I was in a mild state of shock because the next thing I remember was the dentist saying “rinse please”. No fancy nurse with fancy implements like water picks and suction tubes here. Nope, there was a little cup and a porcelain bowl beside the chair to be used for this purpose. What the system lacked in sophistication it made up for in being an opportunity to escape the drill. The water was cool and refreshing and like a live wire in my now exposed nerve endings but I lingered over the bowl swooshing it around in my mouth delaying as long as possible. After a considerable amount of swooshing I spat, and for some reason expected to see water come out of my mouth which left me completely unprepared to watch my own blood swirling around the nice white bowl. I nearly fainted. On the brighter side my consequent light headedness served as a mild anesthetic as I squirmed in the chair, gargling and gagging on little bits of teeth and blood for the next ten minutes. Then another perfectly pleasant “rinse please”. I think this was the extent of his English, which was probably a good thing because the language I was using between rinse and torture cycles could have peeled paint off the walls.

It was about an hour in total I guess. Certainly one of the most unpleasant hours of my life but in the end I had a perfectly good filling, and a solid bite. As much as I wanted to brutally murder the dentist from time to time during that hour, I have to admit that for a guy who has to work on his patients without using any freezing, he did an incredible job. Oh and the best part, I paid 40 bucks total which included the ride both ways, a huge filling, a lifetime phobia of dentists, and some other minor adjustments.

While I was gone Jaime spent some of her time painting a little man and a little woman on the outside of a building at the marina. The building contains showers and washroom stalls, which before Jaime’s handy work had been unwittingly been used as unisex showers and bathroom stalls most of the time. It seems that some time (somewhere between a week and 8 years) ago the signs were stolen along with all the faucets and shower heads and it’s been confusing boaters ever since. The next time you are in the Marina at Bahia de Vita and are able to tell whether you are entering the Woman’s or the Men’s toilette without having to look under the door you can thank Jaime.

 

welcometohell.JPG

pickup.JPG

thursday march 20, 2008 (bahia de vita, cuba)

Over a few 80 cent beers we finally decided on some rough plans. We would team up with Tim and Stefy, the German couple that pulled in beside us last night, and share a car to get us started on some inland travel. The marina is cheap and since it’s very sheltered will be a great spot to leave the boat for a couple of weeks. We’ll work our way to Santiago by car, and from there head West by whatever means available (Tim and Stefy are only taking the car as far as Santiago).

We spent the afternoon in Guardalavaca which seemed to be a pretty touristy place, a bunch of hotels and a nice beach. Not all that exciting. Fortunately our evening would make up for the dull afternoon. Have you ever had a pig slaughtered for your dinner? Now Jaime and I, along with 5 Germans and 2 Argentineans, can say that we have.

I’ll have to be a little vague about the details since it was technically illegal according to some law or another (we were in fact later questioned by the authorities about our nocturnal activities) but the short version involves a pig on a spit, a gregarious multinational contingent of 9, some generous Cuban hosts and a few bottles of rum. We all had a great time, except for the pig who didn’t say much at all but under the circumstances we could hardly blame him.

 

thislittlepiggy.JPG

porkandrum.JPG

mmmmm.JPG

friday march 21, 2008 (baracoa, cuba)

With pork hangovers we made our way to Holguin with Tim and Steffi. The drive was spectacular, mostly because of the constantly changing scenery, but also due to the fact that we were all ready to do a little traveling without being attached to a boat.

Holguin was only a couple hours away and made for a nice spot to lunch. There was a maze of roads into town, all easily navigated due to the help from a nice local guy on a bike wearing bright orange pants. He met us at an intersection on the way into town, picked up on the confused looks we were all wearing on our faces, and motioned for us to follow him. Easier said than done. Our guide dodged horse and carriage, dozens of bike taxis, chickens, goats, school kids, street baseball games, antique cars, street soccer games, tractors, trucks, and cows like he had been doing it his whole life (which of course he had been). If it wasn’t for his orange pants we would have lost him a dozen times, even so he still had to stop and wait for us more than once.

We arrived at the town square and the orange pant wearing daredevil introduced himself as Carlos. The Germans were in need of a church and we were in need of some beer. Carlos helped us both find what we were looking for. Then Jaime and I hung out with him for a while. He was a chef and was happy to practice his English on us while waiting for his shift to start. Carlos was really proud of his town and showed us all the sights, which included this place where a nice lady gave Jaime a manicure and asked for 5 pesos, so we paid her 20 (about a dollar). That seemed crazy until Carlos told us that even at 5 pesos each she could still earn more than a doctor if she was able to do only 5 or 6 a day. We’ve since heard a variety of different amounts that the average Cuban Doctor officially makes, but most figures seem to settle somewhere between 20 and 40 dollars a month. 

A bit about Cuban currency. There’s the Cuban National money, or pesos, which the locals are paid with and use for some things. There’s Convertible Pesos or CUC’s (called cooks) that the tourists are supposed to use and just for fun, the Euro is accepted in a lot of tourist places here as well. There’s about 25 pesos to a CUC, and the CUC is worth a bit more than a Canadian dollar. There’s a 20 percent fee levied on changing the USD, and they haven’t accepted it anywhere here for the last few years so don’t even bother with that. You will have to pay for anything which is government controlled (mostly everything – rental cars, hotel, marina, busses, a lot of restaurants etc) in CUC’s but there is a market for the local money too. If you can get some pesos and find a place to use them you can travel incredibly cheap. I changed 20 CUC’s into pesos and it nearly lasted us the whole trip. You can use pesos for things like local restaurants, farmers markets, or roadside stands. For example, we would pay between 40-50 pesos (50 pesos = 2 CUC’s) for drinks and dinner for both of us, and a lot less if we were just eating peso pizza or some other Cuban version of fast food from a roadside stand. It’s a little confusing at first but it doesn’t take long to get used to the system.

Our new friend Carlos promised the best mohitos in Cuba, and we would later have that promise repeated to us about 37 times a day over the next couple of weeks. According to our rigorous testing though, this was the one mohito promise that was actually kept. It was in the beautiful bar and restaurant where Carlos worked. There was an inner courtyard complete with trees, flowers and fine marble pillars everywhere. Jaime thought the bartender looked like Humphrey Bogart and I suppose that added to the exciting ambiance. This was the kind of polished place that back home we would have expected to pay 30 bucks for a couple of cocktails, here we paid 4.

We met up with Tim and Steffi back at the car at 2:00PM. We wanted to get to Baracoa before nightfall so we needed to get moving. For spending such a short time in Holguin we saw all kinds of great things (like a hundred year old printing press still being used), made a new friend, Jaime got her nails did, we ate some great peso pizza, and had (in our opinion) the best mohitos in Cuba in a beautiful setting. I’m sure the Germans were sick of hearing about all of this since all they had time for was a church service. Actually that’s all Steffi had time for, since Tim is an Atheist all he had time for was reading a newspaper while he waited for Steffi outside the church.

Within a couple of hours it became obvious that we wouldn’t make it to Baracoa before nightfall. It was obvious because the sun had set and we weren’t even in Moa yet. Moa is a little more than half way though, and we thought that staying there might be a better idea than continuing along on the goat trail of a road in the dark. I referred to the guidebook to see what it had to say about Moa. It said this:

“Important economically and horrendous ecologically, Moa is a big ugly mine.”

And that’s only the introduction! The single small paragraph devoted to this poor town goes on to say;

“Unless you are a mining technician or an environmentalist investigating impending ecological disasters there’s absolutely no reason to come here. ‘A better world is possible’ proclaims one of the billboards as you leave the town behind. Absolutely.”

It was tempting to check it out, but the fine red dust that was coating the road along with our car, clothing, and lungs convinced us otherwise and a few hours of slow progress later we were feeling our way into Baracoa.

saturday march 22, 2008 (santiago, cuba)

“Casa Particular” is a Cuban label given to a private residence that provides food and boarding for a fee. They cost less than a hotel room and in our opinion are infinitely more interesting. It’s no wonder then that we ended up staying in one every night that we were away from our boat, except for one. The one exception would be the night that we spent on a bus. Our first Casa Particular turned out to be the nicest. We had a great hostess and her home was beautiful. 30 foot ceilings, tile and stone, 3 dollar breakfast, a huge patio, and faux red leather furniture, it just doesn’t get any better.

fauxred.JPG

seaside.JPG

baracoa.JPG

Turns out that we picked a good time to visit Baracoa. If we had been three days earlier we would have been witnessing an anti-cyclone (whatever that is) whip up the sea into a huge frenzy and pummel the sea front wall, road and buildings. 40 buildings were destroyed and a big chunk of the wall was knocked down, that and a small dead pig lying on the road provided the only evidence that there had been a massive storm. The town is known to be pretty mellow anyway, but I guess the recent storm had people even a little more subdued than usual.

We hired a couple of bici-taxi’s and got a tour of the town. Even though we were paying at least double the normal fare, it was still only a couple of dollars so we felt really bad for our driver who was probably 19 years old and only a 150 pounds soaking wet. Eventually he let me convince him to trade places and I peddled him around for a while. People thought this was pretty funny. They weren’t laughing so hard after I kicked him off and stole his bici-taxi though. I found this an especially difficult way to make a living so eventually quit and went back to the sailing/traveling gig.

changeseats.JPG

stolenbike.JPG

elzorro.JPG

We checked out the baseball stadium. Cubans seem to take baseball very seriously, and they are incredibly good at. We’re no experts but 15 minutes of watching these kids play was all it took to convince us that they could give most major league teams a serious run for their money.

At some point that afternoon we decided that it would be a good idea to carry on to Santiago. On the way we passed through the now infamous Guantanamo. We checked out the huge communist style sculptures there which are evidently designed to make you feel very small and powerless. They reminded Jaime and I of the sculptures we saw while traveling through China. Steffi and Tim said they reminded them of the Eastern Block. We saw the Hotel Guantanamo and since water torture isn’t really our thing we decided to carry on to Santiago. Actually this isn’t ‘the’ Hotel Guantanamo of course, it’s just ‘a’ Hotel Guantanamo. If you look closely at the picture you can actually tell the difference. Note the subtle lack of barbed wire and German Shepards. Now the guide book didn’t say for sure but I think you can even stay at this Hotel Guantanamo and have a nice breakfast without being systematically tortured and held indefinitely without trial.

hotelguantanamo.JPG

bigsculp.JPG

easternblock.JPG

On the way to Santiago we were all impressed with the constantly changing scenery. We went from agricultural farm land to striking coastline complete with huge crashing waves, through dessert to lush rolling hills with jungle-like vegetation. It was all very cool, and then we ran over a chicken. It was a stupid suicidal chicken that literally threw itself against the side of our car as we passed by. There are chickens everywhere in Cuba, it’s the one thing you can count on. Check any restaurant or roadside stand and they will invariably have pollo frito (fried chicken), and it’s usually pretty good. We were at one restaurant where the lady stood there and shook her head at every selection we made from the menu. She let us go through the whole thing like this before we finally got to the last item which was of course, pollo frito. It was a 3 page menu and that was the one thing they had. Why she didn’t just tell us that in the first place I have no idea but I just wanted to illustrate to you the fact that if nothing else, you can always count on a chicken being readily available in Cuba. I guess it was just a matter of time before we ran one over. We backed up to check on the chicken, it was of course very dead. There are always a lot of people on the roads in Cuba, in fact they sometimes even outnumber the chickens. Fortunately we didn’t hit any of them, and fortunately there were a few on this particular stretch of road that were happy to take this chicken off of our hands. With that bit of unpleasant business behind us we carried on for Santiago.

We made a few more stops. One was to buy cheese off a guy who was holding up a plate full of it on the side of the road. Apparently it’s quite common to do your cheese shopping like this in Cuba because we saw at least a half dozen of these guys. They were all holding up the same platters with the same cheese. We bought all kinds of roadside treats like this, and apart from the cheese I couldn’t even begin to tell you what any of it was. It was all quite unrecognizable to us but still quite good and none of it made us sick. Jaime and I have been hauling all kinds of loot around with us since the US for distribution in Cuba, and we were happy to start dolling some of it out. Hitchhikers, roadside cheese peddlers, little old ladies and barefooted families in the mountains like this one were all surprised recipients of some kind of manufactured capitalist goods. If nothing else it was a good icebreaker. I’m sure that everyone we met would have been just fine without the stuff, but it made us feel like we were giving something back, even if it was in such a small and insignificant way.

lootbags.JPG

roadside.JPG

smalltown.JPG

We arrived in Santiago, located a Casa Particular, dropped off our bags and headed straight down to the Grand Hotel which was a treat and overlooked a nice 16th century plaza. We were starved and thirsty after a hot and dusty travel day, and the Bucanero went down like water. Like every other place in Cuba, there was of course an incredible band. After more rounds than I can recall and entrees for both of us, we departed the restaurant with the live music and unbeatable view at about 1AM after paying our 23 dollar bill. Cuba? Si.

sunday march 23, 2008 (santiago, cuba)

Today the Germans left and we explored Santiago by foot. There’s so much life here that it makes us wonder if anyone ever stays home. The nearly half million residents in Santiago always seem to pack into the streets, and everybody is busy at something. Street games include soccer, handball, baseball with a stick and bottle cap, and pretty much anything else you can imagine. People are selling stuff, people are buying stuff and old men are in the park on a bench talking about old ladies (or baseball) over a shared bottle of rum. T-shirts are apparently a popular gift to bring to Cuba, because you see every variety, genre, language and era emblazoned on them. We saw everything from the cowboy in the country wearing a Canadian national olympic hockey team shirt to the old lady in Santiago wearing a “Gnomies are my homies” shirt. Vibrant color, endless sound, laughing, kissing sounds (mostly for Jaime), whistles (also mostly for Jaime) and an incredible 6 piece band hiding behind a non descript doorway on a non descript street inviting you in to listen to them jam. These things are all typical, very typical. We absolutely loved it.

We had dinner at the former Bacardi residence (yes, the Rum people) and ordered way to much food by accident. It was a relatively upscale place and since we couldn’t understand the menu very well we decided to use the prices as a rough guide. They were so low that we assumed that it was an a-la-carte thing and ordered an entrée, a salad and a side each. They turned out to be full entrées despite the ridiculously low prices, so we ended up with two of those plus 4 side dishes on the table. It was really embarrassing having all this food on the table so we tried to scrape all the sides onto one plate and stack the empty ones underneath. I can just imagine what we must have looked like to the locals but the funny thing is that the waitress didn’t even flinch when we ordered all this food. We must have looked really hungry.

After dinner we stumbled upon an impromptu street party complete with live music and dancing. Apparently these incredible bands just find a little square, set up and play all night. People hear the music, grab a bottle of Rum and join the party. It’s really amazing, and now we are certain that the houses in Santiago are the most unused buildings around. There wasn’t one time day or night that we didn’t go outside to find the streets, squares and parks packed. We rounded off the evening by hanging out in a park and people watching, which is apparently the thing to do in this neighborhood because we had a hard time finding a seat.

From toddlers taking their first steps, to dozens of little kids running around like uncontrollable hellions (the knee to waist height varieties). Teenagers posturing, flirting, and for a lucky few kissing. Young couples, young families (somebody had to bring all those kids) and the same old men still sitting around, presumably with a new bottle of Rum. Some were still talking about old women and others had moved on to playing dominos or chess. The square was like this huge outdoor living room full of a big extended family. No fights, no drugs, and everyone seemed to know each other. We’ve never seen anything like it and were really envious. We found the same kind of thing all over Cuba.

At the same hour in Vancouver the downtown parks are full of drug dealers, junkies and prostitutes. Even the cops don’t go in alone, never mind letting your kids muck around unsupervised.

fixerupper.JPG

boxer.JPG

reddress.JPG

monday march 24, 2008 (bayamo, cuba)

Off to Bayamo. We took a horse and cart to the bus stop for one peso each (5 cents). At the bus stop we caught a truck, I think it was an old Russian military transport. Along with 55 of our closest friends we paid our 5 pesos and crammed into the back. There were rows of small steel benches to sit on and we were lucky because our truck that had a canvas top. Some didn’t which would have been miserable today because it rained gatos and perros (working on my Spanish).

There’s a bit of a transportation problem in Cuba. That’s why people subject themselves to being stuffed in the back of a 50 year old military transport and suck diesel fumes while being mercilessly jostled all the way to their destination. It’s also why the horse and carriage, oxen and cart, Chinese bicycle, and 50’s vintage automobiles are all extensively used modes of transportation. You can find every variety in the small rural towns to the largest cities. Sure you could pay 40 CUC for the same trip and ride in the comfortable, air conditioned and almost always empty tourist busses but that would be forgoing one of the most fundamental of all Cuban experiences. Crappy transportation is as Cuban as Rum or the cigar. To miss it would be like going to La Habana and choosing a Coors Light over a Mohito. Only a Coors Light probably wouldn’t kill you. The Cuban train system with the abysmal safety record just might.

There weren’t any other tourists on the military transport truck, and I can’t say that the Cubans looked especially happy about being there either. But here’s a little secret, they aren’t that bad. As long as you are making short hops (we limited our longest truck day to 5 hours) and if it doesn’t rain, which it did. When it rains they fold all the side flaps down so you are in what feels a lot like a big canvas covered tomb. The roof leaks everywhere and you continue to get fumigated and jostled around relentlessly. Minus the diesel fumes, it would be a lot like the log ride at an amusement park, except that this one lasts for hours. But as far as 20 cent travel goes, it was great! 

We finally bounced into Bayamo where we went for hamburgers and a movie for which we were charged 2 pesos (10 cents) admission. We thought this was a great deal until we saw the movie and realized that we had been overcharged. On the way back to our Casa we met a young Cuban guy called Raul that knew more about Canadian politics that we did. Those of you who know us may have laughed at that statement because we admittedly know only slightly more about Canadian politics than the Canadian politicians do (and that’s not very much at all), but this guy was really something. After he finished explaining how our parliament worked to us, we weren’t at all surprised to learn that he was a political science major. We had Raul up there on a pedestal for a while, until we found out that he was at the same movie that we were, and that he liked it. Then we weren’t too sure about him at all.  

Bayamo was beautiful. We chanced upon this cobblestone pedestrian street that was lined with galleries, music shops and art classes. The street itself was full of sculptures, even the benches were pieces of art. The lamp posts each had a big tube of paint sculpted at the base, which I won’t even try to describe, just look at the picture and you’ll see what I mean. It went on like this for blocks and we were completely enamored. This country is full of surprises.

artstreet.JPG

splash.JPG

artschool.JPG

tuesday march 25, 2008 (camaguey, cuba)

This morning I was chatting with the owner of our casa while he smoked a Cuban cigarette. They only cost him something like 40 cents a pack, but I guess they leave off the filters. They are nothing more than pure unfiltered tobacco, and everyone here smokes them. I’m sure that even the blackest lunged chain smokers at home would have a tough time with one of these, but this guy always had one dangling from his lips.

While I sipped my Cuban coffee and he hacked his Cuban butt, two young guys were going up and down the metal staircase behind us. First they carried up a coil of green and yellow wire. Next it was something that looked like a medieval sewing machine on wheels made from the decayed parts of a scrapped soapbox racer. I asked the chainsmoking casa owner about this, we were communicating quite well by this point using my 12 words of Spanish, his 8 words of English and our impeccable international hand gesturing skills. In response he flapped his right arm up and down 3 times, swung his head over towards his left shoulder and said “mmmph”. If you had impeccable international hand gesturing skills like I do you would already know that this translates exactly as; “Thank you for asking. I was hoping for the opportunity to show you what those young men are doing. Please, follow me up those stairs. They lead to the roof top and once we are there I’ll be able to show you precisely what they are up to.”

So I did.

On the roof were the same two young guys, who are not likely to become two old guys. They had spliced that green and yellow wire that I had seen them with a little while earlier directly into the overhead power line. No shit. Then they took the free end, the one supplied with all that current from the overhead power line, and attached it to the medieval sewing machine on wheels made from the decayed parts of a scrapped soapbox racer. The medieval sewing machine on wheels made from the decayed parts of a scrapped soapbox racer actually turned out to be a crude home made welder made from parts of cannibalized automobiles and household appliances. The wheels actually appear to be old bearings from some long dead and gone piece of farm equipment (a theory later confirmed by the chain smoking casa owner through a series of hand gestures far too complicated to describe within a set of parentheses).

They were constructing a frame made from salvaged rebar on which the chain smoking casa owners’ wife would eventually hang plants from. I was amazed to see that they had a welding mask. They only had one though so they shared it. The guy with the mask would do the welding, the guy without the mask would cover his face with a rag, hold the piece of metal being welded and do his best not to look directly at the spark. I knew that it would be difficult scene to convey accurately so I took a lot of pictures. There’s a close up of the green and yellow wire being sliced into the main line, a close up of the machine itself, the welder and his apprentice, and then there’s my favorite, the one with the dog in it. There’s so much going on in that photograph. That guy in the red shirt which has a Fidel Castro quote on it, he’s the chain smoking casa owner and yes, there’s actually one between the index and middle finger of his right hand (the shirt says something about mankind craving justice I think, but remember that without gestures my Spanish is limited to 12 words). That dog in the picture was actually the size of a wolf. He looked like a cross between a German Shepard and the Werewolf of London and he’s left Werewolf of London sized shit all over the roof. The welders were either welding, stepping in Werewolf shit or yelling at the dog to stop sniffing the bare wire connections that were scattered all over the place. I don’t know whose dog it was but there was evidence that he had been shitting there for a while and may have actually lived on the roof. In the foreground you can see the welding machine, yes, that sewing machine on wheels made from the decayed parts of a scrapped soapbox racer, that’s actually the welding machine. You can see that they have attached it to the yellow and green wire which runs directly to the overhead power lines. What you can’t see is that the guy doing the welding is actually suspended three stories off the ground. He’s kneeling on the same metal grate that covers their courtyard, that’s where the chain smoking casa owners’ wife currently hangs her plants. You also can’t see that he is in fact wearing flip flops. No shit. The last thing to point out is the ladder, that sturdy looking thing held fast by the 4 foot chunk of questionable rope. They dragged that ladder up the same stairs onto the roof so that they could weld the really high bits. By this point I had seen enough, and left before they dragged that rickety bullshit ladder through the Werewolf shit over to the edge of the 3 story roof to hand weld a chunk of metal with a home made welder which had been Mickey Moused into an overhead power line while wearing flip flops. We’ve done some crazy things in our time… but these guys were seriously deranged.

weldera.JPG

welderb.JPG

welderc.JPG

weldere.JPG

welderf.JPG

welderg.JPG

Jaime was downstairs using the first internet connection that we’ve seen in Cuba. Apparently the chain smoking casa owner was a “friend of the state” or something like that. He was allowed to keep a PC in the house but only foreigners were allowed access to the internet. For that privilege we paid 5 CUC’s per hour. When I came down from the roof I asked Jaime how it was going. She was trying to update the website and said that it was going good except that every few minutes the screen would go fuzzy and the lights would buzz and then go dim. I explained what was happening on the roof, and we decided to leave.

We trucked our way from Bayamo to Las Tunas where we caught another truck to Camaguey. It poured rain on the second leg so we were once again subjected to the canvas tomb of doom. We arrived just outside of town and had to catch a ride with a local guy who was selling seats in his 20 year old Lada for $7.50 each. We had just spent 5 hours on the trucks and it was still raining so we were in no mood to haggle. Besides 15 bucks was actually a pretty good deal considering that the truck had randomly stopped 30 kilometers from our destination. We said goodbye to the kid from New York we had met on the truck and hopped in. He (the kid from New York) was doing a good job of blending in. He was making his way to Habana as well, sponsored by a language class through NYU of all places. He was a cool guy and we were both glad to see an American sneaking through the country, more of them should. Funny thing about that though, the three of us were told to keep a low profile and not talk to anyone. We weren’t supposed to be traveling this way and apparently the driver could get into trouble for transporting us. We were to be very sneaky. After that little pep talk he lead us onto the truck in front of everyone. So here’s 50 plus locals waiting in the rain to board while these three stupid gringos are ushered in front of them… yeah, real low key there buddy. I’m sure that nobody noticed.

Camaguey sucked. I’m sorry but it did. Maybe it was the rain, maybe it was the dog shit everywhere, but it did. Get this, three or four hundred years ago pirates had a nasty habit of sacking this city. They would leave their boats at anchor somewhere and come all this way inland just to rape, rob and steal in Camaguey. The people of Camaguey eventually tired of being robbed and raped and stuff so they came up with a very clever idea. They designed the city to be utterly impossible to navigate. The city is actually purpose built to be confusing as hell. Streets wind and turn through narrow passages and join up with other streets in the most confounding manner imaginable. I guess the idea was to frustrate the marauding packs of pirates to the point where they just gave up and moved along to do their raping and robbing in the next city. I guess it worked because the totally exasperating concoction of streets and avenues are still in place. Even the locals had no idea how to get from one place to another. There are probably pirates that came, got lost, and never left. We are no pirates but after 5 hours on a truck to get here, the rain, the dog shit and then walking around endlessly trying to find our bloody Casa, we were ready to move on to the next city too.

I’m sure that there are people who have had an incredible time in Camaguey. I’m sure that they have wonderful museums, charming people and a fascinating history. I’m sure that you could even get caught up in the quirky pirate baffling city design, but we didn’t. Circumstantial or not, we hated Cameguey. In fact, it was the only place in Cuba that we didn’t like. Did I mention the hustlers? The place is crawling with them. Every turn you take you are greeted with some sleaze ball pretending to be your friend in order to sell you some fake cigars, a room, a taxi, recommend a restaurant… oh, and of course you are from Canada, what a remarkable coincidence that every single person in Camaguey has a brother, sister, or cousin in Vancouver, Toronto or Montreal.

We fought our way through the throngs of scammers and bici-taxi rip off artists and managed to find a cool bar in a 200 year old building full of pirate artifacts. We drank cheap beer and talked about our next stop. We know just how those pirates must have felt.

wednesday march 26, 2008 (camaguey, cuba)

We missed the truck. Then we missed the train. We were so desperate to leave that we decided to pay the premium and ride the tourist bus, by then we had missed that too. We resigned ourselves to a second night in Camaguey.

We visited a cool farmer’s market and met a taxi driver who was trying to pass himself off as a former medal winning Olympic Cuban boxer. I checked his I.D. and took his name down so that I could check up on him, but we haven’t had internet access since Bayamo so I can’t confirm the story yet.

marketa.JPG

marketb.JPG

marketc.JPG

One more saving grace before we close the book on this place, we found an incredible Italian restaurant. The service was impeccable, the food was above reproach, and they had a clean toilette. This is like the holy trinity of Cuban restaurant standards, but then they pulled one more trick which totally blew our minds. After having such a lousy time we had decided to treat ourselves and found this, the nicest restaurant in town. In this department Camaguey is no slouch, it’s the third largest city in Cuba (after Habana and Santiago) and is known for its restaurants. We had ordered a nice bottle of wine, we ate our fill and we both visited the restroom just because it was the first nice one that we had seen. Then the bill came. It was 17 dollars. Now this was an uppity kind of place. I don’t know who the people were at the tables next to us but, unlike us, they were well dressed, polished, snooty and had coiffed hair. We could only assume that they were not just the bastard offspring of marauding pirates but the Camaguey elite, and yet here was our bill, only 17 dollars.

thursday march 27, 2008 (habana, cuba)

In our attempt to sample every mode of Cuban travel available we decided to ride the rickety rails from Camaguey to Habana. In our attempt to get out of Camaguey as soon as possible we were at the train station by 5:30AM. A couple of hours later we were on our way in relative comfort. Comfortable relative to a 50 year old Russian truck that is. For example, the bathroom was a hole in the ground. You could actually see the tracks whizzing by, but they had a bathroom. It was a 9 hour ride so we were in Habana late the same afternoon.

We spent 5 days in Habana and felt like we only scratched the surface. Opportunities to lose ourselves in the madness abounded. The downtown area can be divided into three main sections, Habana Vieja, Centro Habana, and Vedado. You don’t need much of a plan, just pick an area and then wander around. We stayed at a few different Casa’s and would just strike out from there to see the neighborhood. There’s something to see around every corner. Art, museums, street musicians, restaurants, seedy bars, peso pizza, dance, festivals, boxing, rum and cigars; Habana has it all.

There’s over 2 million people and the city covers over 700 square kilometers. Entire guide books have devoted their pages to this one city. Most nights we would just pick a place to eat and then get ourselves lost after dinner. Without fail we would find ourselves watching a great band, get caught up in a block party, watch some incredible dance troops that just happened to be performing in some random spot, or just sit in a square and people watch. A couple of times we didn’t have anything to do, so we literally just listened for some music. Then we tracked it down to the source and found some huge event taking place, from thousands of people at a huge festival to a few dozen watching some very strange (but very talented) form of interpretive dance. We found some really crazy expensive hotels and drank coffee in the lobby. Everyone told us that Habana can be hard on your budget but we found plenty of beautiful Casa’s and not once did we pay more than 25 CUC’s for a nights stay. At one we stayed up all night and drank Rum with the night watchman. He invited us over to his place because his wife spoke some English, and that was even after he got in trouble for Rumming it up with us.

You would need to try very hard to not have a good time in Habana. It’s a city that lives up to it’s hype. 

 

habana.JPG

habana__2_.JPG

habana__3_.JPG

monday march 31, 2008 (habana, cuba)

So far we have traveled by boat, horse, bike, car, truck and train in Cuba but still haven’t taken a bus. Tonight we will cross that one off the list too. Our bus leaves at 8:30PM and goes all night to Holguin. We should be there by 8:00AM tomorrow morning. This will be our last day in Habana. We had breakfast at the Casa, and took one last wander around. After we had each collected one piece of art to commemorate the occasion we made our way to the terminal.

habana__5_.JPG

habana__7_.JPG

habana__8_.JPG

habana__9_.JPG